I lived in ny last year and i was walking home from my schools football game as i walked i heard “‘Marissa,’ wait up”; and i turned around it was my friend “Rachel,” she said get home there’s some people that was just talking about you, I’m going to walk you home just in case they want to start something… by that point she was a block away running and sorta out of breathe i told her im fine that she doesn’t need to worry and she turned around then a man knocked me out and dragged me into the church … when i woke up the man was on top of me with us both naked. i couldn’t move, i was tied to the benches ..he raped me…… i never told anyone when my dad asked about the bruises i told him me and my friends were pretending to fight and sum jerk jumped in and hit me and he believed me.
I was 12 years old when this happened. And it destroyed me. My parents were divorced. My mother had been seeing this guy, “Mark ” for about four years. So she thought it was time to let us meet his kids. He has two kids. One teenage boy, two years older than me. And one teenage daughter about to graduate high school. “Mark’s” sons name is “Travis”. One day when “Travis” was with his dad at my house he made a move on me. I was so numb, I didn’t know what to think. Really, I thought it was a one time thing.But it keep happening.. Often. One time he pinned me down and went down my pants. I remember calling my best friend and crying to her after it happened. I put up with this for a little over a month, until I worked up the strength to tell him not to touch me. *This destroyed my relationship with my dad. I hated him so much for not being there, and not protecting me. I started getting deeply depressed, and started cutting myself, started drinking, taking random pills, anything to make me feel better. And I never did feel better. Now my mom asks me why i’m so “mean” to him. And I still can’t tell her the truth. I wish I told her, I wish I told someone. I was so alone, and then I started pushing people away. It’ll never be the same, and i know that now. So now i’ll tell anyone, Breaking the silence is the only way to make people see, and listen. And for all the young girls or boys this affects their not alone. And they shouldn’t have to feel like they are.
When i was in the 7th grade i was attacked by a guy from my grade in my local middle school. he threatened me and all i could do was sit there because he had me pinned against a wall. he then tried to rape me. it seemed like hours i was in that bathroom, turns out it was only minutes. i was so relived when one of my friends heard him talking and came into the bathroom. he saved me from a lot of things that could still effect me today. i still feel bad for not fighting him back. and there isn’t a day that goes by that i don’t think about it.