We Shatter Silence Story from Oklee, MN
THE PERSON WHO ABUSED ME WAS MY BIG BROTHER. It wasn’t just one night of pain; it was about 4 or 5 years of torture. Every night my parents left us alone. He would babysit me and he would do weird things to me that i didn’t like but had to put up with. I tried to tell my parents but they didn’t believe me and told me to stop telling lies my brother because he could get hurt if the wrong person heard that. It has been like that my whole life; they always seem to stick up for him and not for me. It’s like they don’t care about me. The worst part is that they told everyone I was lying and it hurts so much because I’m an outcast in my family and community. I do have a few close friends who believe me and my story. The day I turn 18 is the day I will ‘TAKE BACK THE NIGHT’.
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Same situation. My older brother would force me to perform sexual acts on him and he would also molest me. Both while asleep and mentally and emotionally manipulate me as well to do things while I was awake and aware. And not to forget afraid ! You are brave and you are strong. You always have been regardless of what the world has shown you and what you believed about yourself in those moments. It’s not true. You aren’t weak or soft or a punk. Or powerless. Or less than. Or stupid or whatever else you agreed to. Not true. It wasn’t your fault that someone else took advantage of you. Especially someone who was that close to you and was supposed to protect you.
Yes , people do things because they go their own shit going on. And still, that is no excuse for abuse. There’s no excuse for it.
Forgive yourself first and for most. And with that you will see others without that resentment. Doesn’t mean you won’t have discernment but you won’t have that fire of anger in you. Which really is how you are feeling about yourself again, all the things we believed about ourselves in the mist of those experiences. When all we wanted was to be loved and cared for.