Resources about Sexual Misconduct, Sexual Assault, Healthy Relationships, and Helping a Friend
Thank you for wanting to learn more about sexual assault and healthy relationships. The trauma of sexual assault impacts each survivor differently. The resources listed here provide many ways to learn more about this issue. Please know there are many resources available and lots of ways to learn more about these topics. This is just a start.
If you know already that you’d like to get involved, intern, please visit TakeBackTheNight.org and fill out the form to volunteer or intern! Internships are available for winter and summer breaks, as well as the possibility of a one semester or one-year internship.
Websites with More Information
Foundation striving to end sexual violence and coordinate efforts for Take Back the Night marches and rallies around the globe.
This web site offers resources for sexual assault survivors and their supporters. It houses many useful resources such as information about incest and abuse, counseling in both English and Spanish, and lists of counseling centers near you.
Designed specifically for survivors of childhood sexual assault and rape, this site offers message boards and group chats that create a sense of community among survivors and lists of books written to specifically help survivors of childhood sexual traumas.
This web site is for male survivors of sexual assault and offers many helpful resources.
This non‐profit agency supports underserved victims of gender and racial violence, particularly in the Latino community. It offers useful information and resources for survivors in both English and Spanish.
This domain was created to end violence against women of color and includes updated blogs, events listings, and resources.
This site offers referrals and information for sexual assault and crime survivors in both English and Spanish. This site provides an online chat service, a telephone hotline in over 200 languages, and numerous online resources.
- National Sexual Assault Legal Hotline 567-SHATTER
- RAINN Rape, Abuse, and Incest Nation Network Hotline - 1‐800‐656‐HOPE
- Nine Line Crisis Hotline - 1‐800‐999‐9999
- Child Abuse Hotline - 1‐800‐4‐A‐CHILD
- Crisis Hotlines for Abuse & Assault - 1‐800‐962‐2873
- National Domestic Violence Hotline - 1‐800‐SAFE
- Ask A Nurse (free medical advice) - 1‐800‐535‐1111
- National Suicide Prevention Help line - 1‐800‐784‐2433
- Alcohol and Drug Helpline - 1‐800‐821‐4357
- VictimConnect Hotline - 1-855-4-VICTIM
- Department of Defense Safe Helpline - 1-877-995-5247
Apps / Online Resources
Department of Defense’s Safe Helpline App
This app allows survivors within the Department of Defense community to create an individualized care plan and access exercises. This app is available on any iOS or Android devices for free.
This online resource is a self-guided, online program that provides guidance and resources for survivors of sexual assault.
Circle of Six App
An app user can choose six trusted friends to join their “circle”. Then, when in an unsafe or hazardous situation, with just two taps on the app friends can be notified.
Reach Out App
This app enables anyone to locate crisis centers, medical care providers, counselling services, legal aid, and other services within their immediate vicinity.
After Silence: Rape and My Journey Back. Nancy Raine
Nancy Raine provides a powerful response to her rapist’s command to “shut up” in this 278-page moving novel.
First Get Mad, Then Get Justice: The Handbook for Crime Victims. Charles G. Brown
This 276-page novel written by former Attorney General of West Virginia instructs crime victims on how to get justice.
Recovery. Helen Benedict and Susan Brison
This informative guide offers details gathered from many sources on the short- and long-term effects of rape.
Lucky. Alice Sebold
Alice Sebold’s powerful and forthcoming memoir details her rape on her college campus and her subsequent response to the harrowing time in her life.
Male Victims of Sexual Assault. Gillian C. Mezey and Michael B. King (Editors)
This 161-page research novel outlines advances in the research of male sexual assault and the legal reform.
Lived Through This. Anne Ream
This international 216-page novel details stories of sexual assault and survival from people from all walks of live around the globe.
Joining Forces: Empowering Male Survivors to Thrive. Howard Fradkin
For Anyone Who Wants More Resources
The Sexual Assault Care Centre (SACC) is a team of doctors, nurses, and counsellors dedicated to providing emergency medical help to youth, women, and men who have experienced sexual assault. This website offers answers to commonly asked questions that someone who just experienced a form of sexual assault wants to know, including information on STDs, who they can tell, and how to cope.
Sexual Assault Resources is a website that offers legal advice for sexual assault survivors on what type of case they are dealing with and how they should carry out their process.
Center for Family justice provides a definition of sexual violence and how someone can identify signs of sexual violence. This website offers a sexual abuse hotline and ways to help a victim of sexual assault.
womenshealth.gov offers to commonly asked questions regarding what exactly “consent” and “rape” are. It also provides ways to lower the risk of sexual assault.
bestcolleges.com specifically provides statistics on sexual assault on college campuses. It also provides ways to prevent sexual assault in a college party environment.
TYPES OF SEXUAL ASSAULT
Date or “Acquaintance” Rape
This resourceful site aids in the healing of male survivors of sexual abuse
Rainn provides a comprehensive understanding of the sexual assault of men and boys
The mission of 1 in 6 is to aid men who have survived unwanted or sexual abuse live happier and healthier lives
This is a comprehensive list of resources available for male survivors of sexual abuse/ assault
Incest/Childhood Sexual Abuse
This website provides countless resources in print, and online for survivors of childhood sexual abuse.
This website provides the websites, addresses, and phone numbers of organizations that provide resources and healing for survivors of childhood sexual abuse.
Rainn provides a comprehensive list of definitions of childhood sexual abuse and resources for survivors, parents, and guardians
naasca.org is a non profit addressing issues related to childhood abuse and trauma including sexual assault, violent or physical abuse, emotional traumas and neglect by educating the public and offering intervention and recovery services.
This website is the National Resource Center on Domestic Violence. It includes information and resources to assist with domestic violence intervention and prevention efforts.
This website offers information specifically about why the abuser may be doing these things as well as different types of domestic violence, warning signs, and a hotline to call in case of domestic abuse.
This website answers commonly asked questions by women on the topic of domestic abuse and provides other resources to help victims cope with marital/partner rape.
This website works to end partner abuse in LGBTQ relationships. It provides a hotline as well as resources to help a victim.
The Attic Youth Center is a Philadelphia based non-profit that provides resources, guidance, and assistance to LGBT youth in the area. If you are not located near Philly, their website still provides resources.
This site, Women Against Abuse, provides a detailed resource list for LGBTQ relationships such as hotlines, counselling, teen resources, and information.
The Network LA Red is a non-profit organization led by survivors that works to end partner abuse in lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, SM, polyamorous, and queer communities.
Women in Transition aims to provide resources, support, and guidance for women who are survivors of domestic abuse.
The Trevor Project provides crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer & questioning (LGBTQ) young people under 25.
This site has links/lyrics to many different types of songs about sexual assault.
This site is an advertisement for a book written by survivors.
Allies in healing: When the Person You Love was Sexually Abused as a Child. Laura Davis (NY: Harper Perennial, 1991).
Laura Davis offers guidance and advice for partners, friends, and parents who seek to support sexual assault survivors in their lives.
Beginning to Heal. Ellen Bass and Laura Davis
This is a wonderful and short book which is often a great first start for people as it helps to make sense out of trauma and also out of the process of recovery without being too overwhelming.
The Courage to Heal. Ellen Bass and Laura Davis
This is one of the first “self‐help” books which has been edited several times. It is very useful but can be pretty overwhelming at first. It is very practical – gives explanations, vignettes and has lots of questions. I haven’t seen the newest edition so not sure how it may vary.
The Courage to Heal Workbook: For Women and Men Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse. Laura Davis (NY: Harper Perennial; 1st edition, 1990). This is a companion workbook.
The Date Rape Prevention Book: The Essential Guide for Girls and Women. Scott Lindquist (Sourcebooks Inc, 2000).
The Date Rape Prevention Book is a proactive source of information essential for girls and women to safeguard themselves. These pages look at when and where date rape happens, what turns an ordinary man into a rapist and the three ingredients in most acquaintance rapes. In non‐judgmental terms, the book explores the roles of drugs and alcohol, tells women what to do if they are confronted and provides communication techniques and physical maneuvers that do not require martial arts training to help women escape an escalating situation.
Ditch that Jerk: Dealing with Men Who Control and Hurt Women. Pamela Jayne (Hunter House, 2000).
Ditch That Jerk is a gritty, honest, and most of all experienced view of physical and emotional abusers and their effect on victims. Engagingly written, it shows women how to assess their partners and relationships for potential abuse, and for potential change ‐ or not. Author Pamela Wiseman uses examples from counseling sessions to illustrate how the mind of an abusive man works and how to identify the patterns. She details the tricks used by such men to keep women in line and discusses warning signs, alcohol and drugs, and the excuses people use to explain abuse. Optimistic and empowering without candy‐coating a difficult topic, this book gives women the tools to make clear ‐ headed decisions about damaging relationships.
Emotionally Involved: The Impact of Researching Rape. Rebecca Campbell (Routledge, 2001).
Emotionally Involved gives a vivid picture the challenges researchers who study traumatic events face. It is essential reading for anyone concerned with the sociology of emotions, and for researchers, therapists and fieldworkers, and for those on the frontlines of rape crisis and domestic abuse.
Getting Free: You Can End Abuse and Take Your Life Back. Ginny NiCarthy (WA: Seal Press, 1997).
This book has changed the lives of tens of thousands of women. Ginny NiCarthy features important new information from the latest studies and most recent research on the subject. New chapters include an analysis of whether batterers’ treatment really works, which programs help violent men change, and which do not; the results of research on the ways that many men who batter also abuse their children, and specific reactions of children to battering; the cultural and legal issues relevant to immigrant women; and a presentation of how religious beliefs and religious communities affect the real and perceived choices of women facing violence.
The Gift of Fear. Gavin De Becker (Dell, 1998).
Gavin de Becker shows you how to spot even subtle signs of danger‐‐before it’s too late. Shattering the myth that most violent acts are unpredictable, de Becker, whose clients include top Hollywood stars and government agencies, offers specific ways to protect yourself and those you love, including…how to act when approached by a stranger…when you should fear someone close to you…what to do if you are being stalked…how to uncover the source of anonymous threats or phone calls…the biggest mistake you can make with a threatening person…and more.
Growing Beyond Survival: A Self‐Help Toolkit for Managing Traumatic Stress. Elizabeth G. Vermilyea (MD: Sidran Press, 2000).
This book is a wonderful resource for trauma survivors and their therapists. It provides needed tools and exercises to assist abused and traumatized individuals to increase their self‐awareness and to learn essential self‐regulation and boundary‐management skills. Vermilyea is an excellent teacher who is at once empathetic about the developmental deficits that develop following chronic abuse/trauma but who also offers concrete explanations and mechanisms for change and growth.
Healing the Trauma of Abuse: A Woman’s Workbook. Mary Ellen Copeland and Maxine Harris (CA: New Harbinger Publications, 2000).
This workbook offers women who have suffered sexual, physical, or emotional abuse crucial skills for coping, self‐understanding, and self‐care. The book is designed to be worked through from beginning to end, with self‐evaluation questionnaires, writing exercises, and a variety of activities and relaxation techniques throughout. Also included are questions to ask a doctor, a personal crisis plan, and a comprehensive list of resources.
I Can’t Get Over It: A Handbook for Trauma Survivors, 2nd Edition. Aphrodite Matsakis (CA: New Harbinger Publications, 1996).
Dr. Matsakis explains in this novel that Post Traumatic Stress Disorder can apply to survivors of rape and sexual assault as well as soldiers.
I Never Called it Rape: The Ms. Report on Recognizing, Fighting, and Surviving Date and Acquaintance Rape. Robin Warshaw (NY: Harper Perennial, 1994).
The classic book that broke new ground by thoroughly reporting on the widespread problem of date and acquaintance rape has now been completely updated to include recent studies, issues, current events, and controversies.
If He is Raped: A Guidebook for Parents, Partners, Spouses, and Friends. Alan McEvoy, Debbie Rollo, and Jeff Brookings (FL: Learning Publications Inc., 2003).
A short guidebook on how the family and friends of a male rape victim can help him in his recovery. It offers advice for members of the family.
If She is Raped: A Guidebook for Husbands, Fathers, and Male Friends. Alan W. McEvoy and Jeff B. Brookings (FL: Learning Publications Inc., 1991).
This book offers ways that male family members and friends can support a female friend or loved one who has been a victim of sexual assault.
If You Are Raped: What Every Woman Needs to Know. Kathryn M. Johnson (FL: Learning Publications Inc., 1985).
This book directly addresses the victim. It provides coping mechanisms that the victim can try and steps to take to tell other people about the situation.
It Happened to Me: A Teen’s Guide to Overcoming Sexual Abuse. William Lee Carter (CA: New Harbinger Publications, 2002).
This workbook is meant for teens who have gone through a form of sexual assault and provides them with exercises to help them cope and come to terms with what happened to them. William Lee Carter is a psychologist and takes a positive and sensitive approach to the topic of teen sexual assault.
Male on Male Rape. Michael Scarce (MA: Perseus Publishing, 1997).
This is one of the first examinations on a very unrecognized part of sexual assault: male on male rape. It raises awareness concerning such a difficult topic. Michael Scarce is a student in medical sociology at the University of California, San Francisco.
May I Kiss You? A Candid Look at Dating, Communication, Respect, & Sexual Assault Awareness. Mike Domitrz (WI: Awareness Publications LLC, 2003).
This book provides an in depth look at dating and relationships and how sexual assault can occur in relationships too. Author Michael J. Domitrz reveals why asking first before kissing or “making a move” is extremely important in a modern day relationship.
The Other Side of Silence: Women Tell About Their Experiences with Date Rape. Christine Carter (Avocus Publishing, 1995).
This book provides a state-by-state listing of rape crisis centers. It shows personal accounts of women who have been through date rape and the opinions of health professionals on how to recognize factors common in rape situations.
Rape in Marriage. Diane E.H. Russell (Indiana University Press, 1990).
Author Diane E.H. Russell is a radical feminist writer and activist. This book provides an in-depth study of rape in marriage: the victims, the motivations of spouses who rape, the prevalence of these assaults and the nature of these assaults.
Real Rape. Susan Estrich (Harvard University Press, 1988).
This book reveals the law’s casual treatment of rape cases where the man knows the woman or when the man doesn’t use a weapon. This book is a call for reform for lawmakers to change the way they consider these certain cases.
Recovering from Rape (2nd edition). Linda Ledray (NY: Henry Holt and Company, 1994)
Author Linda E. Ledray is a clinical psychologist and provides an in-depth handbook on the recovery process of rape for both the victim and their loved ones.
Secret Survivors: Uncovering Incest and Its After Effects in Women. Sue E. Blume (Ballantine Books Inc.,1997).
This book, by Doctor Sue E. Blume, is the first book to provide a definition of incest that includes any adult abuser and focuses on the effects of a victim of incest. It shows how incest can often be the root of social and eating disorders or drug and alcohol abuse.
Sex in the Forbidden Zone: When Men in Power – Therapists, Doctors, Clergy, Teachers and Others – Betray Women’s Trust. Peter Rutter (Fawcett Book Group, 1996).
The author Peter Rutter did thousands of in-depth interviews regarding this often-unrecognized form of sexual assault, when a “consenting” adult can be manipulated and used by a man in a power of authority.
Sexual Assault in Context: Teaching College Men About Gender. Christopher Kilmartin and Alan Berkowitz (FL: Learning Publications, 2000).
This book addresses how not many colleges in North America have programs that deal with the masculine culture surrounding sexual assault. It discusses the aspects of masculine culture that sustains the violation of women. This book also includes prevention strategies, information on funding, and additional resources into gender awareness.
Stopping Rape: A Challenge for Men. Rus Ervin Funk (PA: New Society Publishers, 1993).
In this book, Rus Ervin Funk addresses how men do not accept or believe that this is happening around them in terms of sexual assault. He dives into why sexual violence is so acceptable among men and how their way of thinking is hurting the effort to stopping rape.
Strong at the Broken Places: Overcoming the Trauma of Childhood Abuse. Linda Sanford (Avon Books, 1990).
This novel brings together the stories of survivors of childhood trauma, sexual abuse, and parental neglect. Most importantly, this novel outlines resilience and healing.
Surviving Childhood Sexual Abuse: Practical Self‐Help for Adults Who Were Sexually Abused as Children. Carolyn Ainscough and Kay Toon (Perseus Publishing, 2000).
This novel eases the journey of surviving childhood sexual abuse with discussion of all of the emotions that ensue and how to take steps towards healing.
Surviving the Silence: Black Women’s Stories of Rape. Charlotte Pierce‐Baker (W.W. Norton & Company, 2000).
This powerful novel weaves together both the author’s story and stories of survival from black women about their sexual assault.
Survivors and Partners: Healing the Relationships of Sexual Abuse Survivors. Paul A. Hansen (Heron Hill Publishing Co, 1991).
This book provides resources for couples or individuals who are in the process of healing from childhood sexual abuse. This book provides a clear and comprehensible guide for healing and understanding trauma.
Transforming a Rape Culture (Reprint Edition). Emilie Buchwald, Pamela R. Fletcher, and Martha Roth (Milkweed Editions, 1995).
This novel details the origin of sexual violence and its prevalence in today’s culture. The diverse contributors to this work allow for a truly diverse set of perspectives and topics to be detailed.
Trauma and Recovery. Judith Herman.
Judith Herman, a clinical psychologist, asserts that “psychological trauma is inseparable from its social and political context”. This book is often cited as the resource for understanding the trauma of survivors.
Trust After Trauma. A Guide to Relationships for Survivors and Those Who Love Them. Aphrodite Matsakis (CA: New Harbinger Publications, 1998).
This novel guides trauma survivors through the process of building and strengthening bonds through healing exercises.
The Verbally Abusive Relationship: How to Recognize It and How to Respond. Patricia Evans (MA: Adams Media Corporation, 1996).
The Sexual Healing Journey. Wendy Maltz
A really helpful and accessible book that deals more specifically with allowing oneself to feel sexual again.
Victims No Longer: Men Recovering From Incest and Other Sexual Child Abuse, Reprint edition. Michael Lew (NY: Harper & Row, 1990).
This valuable resource offers male survivors of sexual child abuse solace and strength in their journey of recovery.
Who’s Afraid of the Dark? A Forum of Truth, Support, and Assurance for Those Affected by Rape. Cynthia Carosella (NY: Harper Perennial, 1995).
Cynthia Carosella’s book provides immediate resources for survivors of rape and the comfort and solace needed to heal and grow.
You Are Not Alone: Guide for Battered Women. Linda P. Rouse (FL: Learning Publications Inc., 1986).
This novel provides comfort and understanding for women who are/ were physically and emotionally abused by trusted men in their lives.
Queering Sexual Violence – Radical Voices from Within the Anti-Violence Movement. Jennifer Patterson (FL: Riverdale Avenue Books, 2016).
This book creates a space for queer, trans, and gender non-conforming individuals within the anti-violence movement. Topics included in this novel are sex worker rights, racial justice, gender self-determination, disability justice, and queer & trans liberation brought through authentic voices.
Hunger. Roxanne Gay
Roxanne Gay delivers yet another powerful memoir about her ceaseless battle for control between herself and food. In her essays, Roxanne dives into the traumatic event that was a catalyst in her life. Roxanne is candid, brave, and vulnerable as she ventures to understand how to love yourself and your body.
Lovely Bones. Alice Sebold
“So begins the story of Susie Salmon, who is adjusting to her new home in heaven, a place that is not at all what she expected, even as she is watching life on earth continue without her — her friends trading rumors about her disappearance, her killer trying to cover his tracks, her grief-stricken family unraveling. Out of unspeakable tragedy and loss, THE LOVELY BONES succeeds, miraculously, in building a tale filled with hope, humor, suspense, even joy.”
“Relentless, remorseless, and inspirational, this “horrific, hope-filled story” (Newsday) is certain to haunt a generation of readers. Precious Jones, 16 years old and pregnant by her father with her second child, meets a determined and highly radical teacher who takes her on a journey of transformation and redemption.”